arctic

maybe i should wear gloves in the office.
wants to leave this place asap!
think i’ll miss my buddies here.
but i still want to leave.
definitely won’t miss the devil.
she doesn’t wear prada.
i want chanel!
chanel 2.55 <3
this is damn random.
i have nothing to do at work that’s why.
though there’s submission tomorrow.
but there’s nothing much yet.
might have to OT =(
last kickboxing lesson tonight!
will have to skip if OT.
signed up for more lessons.
keep fit time.
NOT diet.
me never grow fat only grow fatter.
there’s a difference.
1 more day!
don’t like to msg ahgong.
his replies like very cold sometimes =(
or that it feels very fu yan.
hope he does well for his live firing.
and i really regret writing that letter.
after he said they’ll use it to mindfuck them.
though i don’t know how.
i wonder if they’ll read it =O
sudden loud thunder!
my fingers are freezing =(
it’s dark outside.
gonna rain soon.
payday’s coming!
time to save up some money.
thinking of studying soon.
i hate working what with all the politics.
i hate the hongky.
i am not your personal secretary okay!
knsccb !#%@#
gonna study HR i think.
remember how i used to complain about the attachment company?
actually it wasn’t that bad.
and daddy says he can see that i was happier working there.
i had ollie there with me!!
now i don’t =((
i miss poly life.
i miss my babes.
i wanna sit at the underpass eating tabao-ed beehoon.
skipping lectures to eat pepper lunch at IMM.
slacking at the underpass or CC basement.
getting chased off the CC basement by “ollie’s best friend”
buying onigiris and vitasoy up to class.
being (almost) always late for class.
laughing at shyy burping.
all the funny antics and lovely mr woo woo.
and then i miss those times in poly year 1 when the n1 people would meet up like almost everyday.
how we would hangout at macs most of the times.
laughing and being happy.
i don’t wanna grow up =(
growing up means more stress and responsibilities.
i wanna be that cute kid i once was.
sleeping eating playing all day.
no responsibilities.
no money issues.
i wanna be a taitai!
work when i want to.
slack when i want to.
no worries about money.
of course i want my hubby to love me too.
i don’t think i’ll be happy even if i’m a taitai but hubby doesn’t love me =(
i need lots of TLC.
i think it’s very hard to love me.
sometimes i wonder if zy finds it hard too.
i’m afraid.
of what?
of doing the wrong things.
of saying the wrong things.
of things going wrong.
of insects.
of supernatural.
of losing my loved ones.
of having no money.
of angry people.
of people who’re mad at me.
of babies who cry nonstop.
of overzealous dogs.
i want a dog!
dar wants to keep a dog.
but mummy says mama doesn’t like dogs.
and daddy will surely say no.
‘cos then who’ll look after it.
when he pees or poops.
mama? yeye?
dar says he’ll do it but i know he won’t. HA
it’s 4PM
the hongky’s coming back from his meeting.
please come back late!
noisy bugger.
i thought about it for the past few days.
i realised what’s missing.
but i haven’t said anything yet.
i wonder if he even bothers.
maybe it’s forgotten.
hmm hmm
i feel very lifeless these days.
and i’ve got a very boring life.
it’s like work, home, fb, sleep everyday.
except thursdays where i have kickboxing.
and saturdays and sundays no work!
i feel like i’ve missed out on loads of things.
i need a new wallet.
maybe it’s my wallet that causes my $$ to go so fast.
superstitious much?
i need to cut my hair.
my fringe is irritating me.
too long.
the last time i cut was 2 months ago?
my hair is growing longer!
duhhh~
and yes this post is very long.
i spend 1 hour 30 mins on this i think.
just random thoughts popping up in my mind.
i gonna go daydream now.
byebyebye!

freezing to death~

rahhhhh my hands are cold my nose is cold my feet is cold even my ears are cold! damnnn i don’t understand why my tolerance towards cold is sooo low considering the fact that i sleep in aircon every night. blahh

you know, i’ve been thinking alot these few days (the result of having too much free time) and i realised that i not only need emotional closeness but physical closeness too. i mean like how i need to be able to see my friends/boyf frequently too. now i feel like wei’s the only one here for me now like she’s the only one who can make me feel happyness now (besides some funny stuffs at work), and i wish wing was here too though i know that she’ll always be here with me in the heart hahah <3

and then there’s zy too. sometimes i think why my first relationship’s like that! like only together for a few months and then he has no time for me already. but then i’m handling it pretty well as compared to the first week he went in lol. like how he would take ages to reply my replies to HIS smses especially since i replied right after receiving it. which is the reason why i don’t feel like smsing him because i know that i’ll only torture myself as i’ll be waiting for his reply but then i’ll end up smsing him still and waiting for his reply the whole day. lol well i’m slowly trying to get used to it.

and i’ve got god “children” hahha 3! so honoured. i told wei next time i have one she’ll be the godma too (needless to say, wing will be too) heheh but i think they’ll have to wait for few years. i WILL get one! haha her new 4 month old is so damn cuteee not in photos though LOL but he likes to bite =c

and i wanna go to SPOOKTACULAR! it’s this halloween event at sentosa but then after seeing the video i’m having second thoughts. hahah it seems scarier than the night safari one luhh and night safari’s isn’t very scary but still i got scared =/ sianzation

4 more days till ah gong gets back! shall remind myself to bring aloe vera for his abrasions. so kelian =( and next week is like his field camp and he’s sure to have abrasions & mosquito bites & aches.

2 more hours left till end of work. and i’m on leave tomorrow! no work = happy jo-ann! hahah can’t wait for bonus day and then off i go wooots~

Today, I texted my brother saying “Always remember I love you! Never forget it!” to which he answered: “You better not be doing drugs.” FML

and then i saw this on FML and straight away thought of dar HAHA maybe i should try smsing him too to see his reply.

didn’t mean it

It’s really amazing when two strangers become the best of friends, but it’s really sad when the best of friends become two strangers.

suddenly i feel that i’ve been neglecting my friends. like .. ever since i’m with zy i practically spent everyday day with him. and you know, before when i was single, i tell people that i won’t make my boyf my everything. i won’t neglect my friends because of him. but now that i think about it, i did what i said i wouldn’t do. and that’s bad. i can’t make him my everything. what if i lose him one day. goodness. but it’s like i want to spend everyday with him. and when he’s not around i wish he were. and i seem to have stopped talking to my friends already. though i do talk to them when i see them online at times. i feel like i’ve got to start reconnecting with my friends. because i know they’ll still be there for me no matter what happens and they’ll never leave me unlike a boyf that might leave me for another girl. not that i think zy will do that. it’s just a girl’s insecurities. i’m sorry to my friends if i’ve seem like such a stranger to you, i didn’t mean to do that. i just feel like i need some time alone now first. and baby, i do love you and i’m not regretting okay. don’t anyhow think.

For you see, each day I love you more.
Today more than yesterday and less than tomorrow.

: worm

girl, you’ve been thinking too much lately. that’s what i feel. sometimes thinking too much is bad for your health. besides you’re already killing much of your brain cells on your studies. as what i said, that’s how life is. there’re times when you treat someone really good and they don’t even care, even “treating you like dust” (as quoted). you just have to decide whether they’re worth your time, either choose to treat them the way they treat you or continue treating them the way you do hoping that one day they’ll realise how good a friend you are(:

hmm.. hopefully you aren’t referring to me la. haha anyway, you’ve still got me there for you!

a happy post

i thought i’ll have a “no life” life after starting to work. BUT i’ve been going out alot alot alot since then. HAHA i think much more frequently then when i was studying =.= and been staying out till late late too. my skin condition is getting worse! my eye rings are super dark and my eye bags are huge. i look sleepy in most of the photos i took! but i think i starting to get used to it. lol

anyway this is my 11th week at work! heheh im still surviving over there. though they’re some hiccups along the way but thankfully i have people helping me. so everything’s a-okay!

been prawning in the 1st few weeks i think. hahah fun fun fun. even caught “lobsters” not by me la! haha

and and! i drove for the first time after getting my license which was like 6 months ago. teeheehee great feeling!! thanks to zy’s car. hahah was sooooo nervous that i was kind of shaking inside. haha but i managed okay from what they say.

ohh before this was cin’s and ron’s birthday! bought a polaroid for cin and she’s been taking photos with each since then. hahah think we made the right choice but she’s spent a bomb on the films. hehe photos up on fb.

bought a watch for ron. turns out he received lots of watches =.= was a fun gathering over at the chalet. though had to leave early cos i had to go to work for a stupid talk on sat =/ think the photos are all on fb ardy.

then there’s jerome’s birthday and we went to surprise him at his house. then my aunt forced him to bring us out for dinner. lol

grad day finally! metup with oli early in the morning to rent the car. in the end we couldn’t rent cos we weren’t 21 yet. wth man. we waited so long for them somemore. and we cabbed to 2 other places after that too. but still couldn’t rent one. luckily jc found numbers for us to call and we managed to get a vios. damn small and the steering sucks. made me so afraid of driving ardy. the photos are all on fb so won’t post them here.

and it was phototaking at home with kor & family.

and it was early sun morning that we went to ntu for a photoshoot. damn tired and hottttttttttt that day. photos are up on fb so i’ll just post my fav of the lot hereeeee. credits to jeremy

on to more recent events is wei’s birthday! loads of stuffs that i forgot what happened. hahah sorry anyway jsut view the photos on fb. lollll <3<3

and just last sat went to acer to collect my beloved lappy. wei accompanied me and we camwhored on the bus back. hahah took lots of stupid photos and then to her house for wii! wii-ed for almost 6 hours!! MY ARMS ARE STILL ACHING FROM IT! i even have difficulty bending my arms back to hook my bra. lol photos up on fb toooooo

i have no idea why i like this photo alot. hahaha

hugeeeeeeee post with photos. see! i seldom post photos and when it comes i spammm. hahahah nothing much to write too cos i can’t really remember and don’t know what to write either. i’m not much on these kind of posts. haha

cindy’s 21st!

just back from cin’s 21st celebration. tired after one whole week working like a cow and staying after knockoff without OT. see how hardworking i am. anyway, was really great meeting some of them again. like so long since i last saw them. hope cin liked her pressies. smacked her hard. and… happy 21st birthday. i can’t think straight right now. just need to sleep. but i can’t resist not using the computer. lol crazy bitch. i just had this weird conversation in my head about my clothes talking to each other =.=

.

top that i like to wear: wah lao. she like to put me on and take me off again and again. somemore i drop on the floor already she don’t want to pick me up. wait so long then pick up. shit.

top that i don’t wear anymore: at least she wears you right. she doesn’t even pick me up or spare me a look at all. i’ve been living in this dingy old cupboard (it’s not really old and dingy. it just came up in my head =/ ) for don’t know how long already. can’t she just give me away. at least i have a better chance at being worn. sobs sobs T.T

.
i think i’m officially crazy.

ps. oh yes, i’m supposed to buy 4D tomorrow. the numbers that cin picked and 7 of us are sharing to buy it. wish us lotsa luck!

: laopo <3

“You just have to go after what you want
and if it doesn’t want you back then
it doesn’t deserve you anyways.”

“Never be sad for what is over, just be glad that it was once yours.”

“Things change, people change and it doesn’t mean you forget the past or try to cover it up.
It simply means that you move on and treasure the memories.
Letting go does not mean you’re giving up.
It means accepting that some things weren’t meant to be.”

“They say if you love something let it go,
if it comes back its yours, and that’s how you know
its for real, its for keeps.”

“Sometimes you just need to cry and be sad.
you need to break down and be torn apart.
you need to learn how to pick yourself up and put yourself back together.
sometimes, the only way to be happy is to give into sadness first.
cause without sadness, there is no happiness, you would never learn to smile.”

“The past is gone but something might be found to take it’s place”

“Always take comfort in knowing that you are independent enough, that you don’t need to rely on anyone else for your own happiness.”

DON’T waste your time worrying about guys,
they will come and go.
DON’T waste your time caring about the people who don’t like you,
chances are you don’t like them –e i t h e r–.
DON’T waste your time worrying if people are talking about you,
you affected their lives, they didn’t affect yours.
waste your time with friends–live for the moment,
laugh often, be immature, do anything and everything.
if its something you’ll regret in the morning,
sleep late and when you wake up, laugh about it with your friends
because your friends are what matter most.
when you have your friends, you have everything.”

“The love of a friend is the most wonderful love one can have.”

.

just to let you know that i’ll always be here even if i seem inattentive lately.. (:

reconnecting

i’ve been having dreams recently and most of them have my friends in it. old friends (primary school) and now friends.

i’ve always wanted to look for my primary school friends from Hong Kah Primary School. especially Cristabel, who was in the same class and used to stay in the same block as me. and there’s also Sarah, a philippino classmate who’s been to my house a couple of times and talks to my maid =) and then there’s Peixuan, Shi Hui, Hwee Gek, Hannah, Diana, Nicole, Hafidz, Lester, Felix, Lionel.. can’t really remember the other names. and and Mr Gan. a really nice teacher. he was my form teacher in Primary 5 and he started reading short parts of Harry Potter just before school ends. see! before Harry Potter got famous ok. haha

my dream was super weird though. i decided to join this contest (don’t know what contest is it) because of whatever reason that i might meet my ex-classmates from Hong Kah (think it’s cos the contest is held near Bukit Batok?) and then when i went there, true enough i saw most of my classmates there. and then i see everyone and we started greeting each other sayinghow long we haven’t met (as if we’ll remember each others faces till now =.=) then i keep looking around and finally sees Cristabel and i woke up o.O

and then there was another dream where i dreamt of me talking to some people (can’t remember who) and then oli smses me. a super long msg. forgot what was in it except for this part that she says she saw a pair of super pretty heels online and she bought it (andi was thinking how much). and then my dream went off to somewhere else and in the back of my mind i keep telling myself that i have to reply oli. but in the end i woke up without replying her sms. lol weird. i think this is ‘cos oli seems to be MIA-ing? haha

anyway, been sending in my resumes to many many jobs since last week and for the past few days been getting calls in the early morning, disturbing my precious sleep, asking me to go down for interviews etc. though most of those are recruitment agencies. hopefully i get a job soon. but at the same time, i still want to rest leh. see how things goes.

hmm, maybe i’ll go dig out the primary school photos and scan it to post it here. hehehe

vomit

i don’t know what’s wrong with me. feeling moody recently. actually, i think since school started. this semester sucks! the schoolwork, e-learning, class, projects! i don’t know if i can take it any longer. i just want to go through this semester fast. i don’t want to compete with others. i just want to be able to pass. i get irritated easily too. especially in class. because of certain people. RAHHHHH!
i don’t have the mood to do anything. i don’t do tutorials. my assignments are submitted late. everything’s done last minute. i’m procrastinating. A LOT. my workshop from 2 weeks ago is still not done and not submitted. just because there’s no deadline. so i keep telling myself i’ll do it tomorrow. and that tomorrow never comes. i really have to get started on that because last week’s workshop is a continuation of that. which means that i’m already behind by 2 workshops. plus this week, it’ll be 3! urgh!!!!!!! get me out of this shithole.
thank god for friends that i can count on. i’m glad that they’re there. without them, i don’t think i’ll be going to school, to tutorials & lectures. i recently felt betrayed by someone. someone whom was pretty close to me. but things have changed since. and.. i don’t know. i feel like i can’t tell her things anymore. she’s .. weird. yeah, i’m weird too, but a different kind of weird =/ =] =(